Counselling For Children
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Often when children are relocated they feel very isolated and resentful. The main reason is they feel they did not have a say in the move and therefore feel quite disempowered. It is important for parents to be patient and understanding with their children as they adjust to their new location.
Although children often find it easier to make friends they also can feel unsettled by their new surroundings. Teenagers may be concerned about not fitting in. They may feel isolated by not understanding the pop culture or lingo. Alternatively they may think that kids in their new country are lame. If you are a parent of a teenager I am sure you can understand that they have a tendency to focus on the negative and let you know what they don’t like.
Schooling can be difficult in any country. It can be especially difficult if you have to complete it in a foreign language. If you are going to put your children in a local school set them up for success by getting them help with the local language. Alternatively there are a lot of good International schools or the option of boarding school.
Boarding school can is a common option for international parents and depending on your position it may be covered by the company you work for. This can be a good way for your child to stay in contact with their culture and friends. The problem with this is that you may only see your child on school holidays. Be sure to research the school that you are sending them to and be confident that there isn’t a culture of bullying. Other expats with children should be able to give you some advice.When you do relocate you need to be extra attentive with your children. It can be easy to forget what a big transition this is for them when you are busying yourself with everything else. You need to remember that you are the only stability they have in the new country so they probably need you more than they will let on.
Try and make the move seem exciting and include them in things. Maybe let them choose a pet once they settle or a holiday of their choice after the first year. For younger children keep them busy with a scrap book of their new adventure and for teens encourage their input on decisions as it will make them feel empowered. Sometimes the way teenagers act in the new country will be different to what you are used to. Discuss this with your teen and see what their thoughts are.Relocating children can be a very difficult task. If they are not happy they are unlikely to keep it a secret. The upside of this is that it can bring your family a lot closer together and make your children more independent. Children who grew up overseas have very high university attendance rates and they tend to be resilient and tolerant. So even though the growing pains can be hard the eventual outcomes can be very rewarding.
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